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Gonna Show My Scars In Public For The First Time..
Posted 19 August 2012 - 11:41 AM
I'm kind of scared though. Like I don't want people looking at me and only seeing my scars, or feeling uncomfortable, or whatever. But I don't want to hide. And I'm afraid of my parents' reaction--they know I've done it, but they won't know how bad it's gotten, and Im afraid they'll MAKE me hide my scars, or try and get rid of them. And I kind of need them there, to feel like I don'thave to make more.
Posted 19 August 2012 - 01:32 PM
Btw dont let your parents make you do anything its your life live it the way u wanna
Posted 19 August 2012 - 02:56 PM
If i may intercede with the following. It was my own experiance that external factors rarely provided sufficicient motivation to change my own internal factors. By all means rock your scars, but be aware of the possible triggers. You already have an idea of some of the things to expect from your own family and possibly strangers. Just mentally prepare yourself. I know when i wear t shirts and am on the subway/bus etc with a out stretched arm during rush hour i often " catch " people glimpsing at me. I just tell myself they reaaally love my watch lol.
Posted 19 August 2012 - 04:29 PM
Posted 19 August 2012 - 07:37 PM
It was my own experiance that external factors rarely provided sufficicient motivation to change my own internal factors. By all means rock your scars, but be aware of the possible triggers.
Ditto this. I haven't actively self-injured in over five years(!) and I still sometimes find myself uncomfortable with showing my wrists in public. If I forgot a bracelet and I go to work, I feel awkward pretty much all day. On the other hand, if I'm just out and about running errands, I typically won't care to wear anything on them. The thing is, you can get caught off-guard when you least expect and I think taking it slow might be a good idea. Like try going out to store where you won't expect to meet anyone you know- hanging out at a Barnes and Noble for a few hours can be a nice way to break into the feeling of your own skin and scars (if that makes any sense.) Good luck, it is a big step! Just be careful not to set yourself up to fail, you know what I mean? That will make the whole experiment do more harm than good.
Posted 20 August 2012 - 12:29 AM
Posted 20 August 2012 - 03:57 AM
Thanks everyone, yeah I do understand that it won't MAKE me stop, but I feel like the outside pressure might at least help me keep my mindset, although I can't imagine it doing anything when I have the urges...but I've managed 8 days so far, urges and all.
Posted 21 August 2012 - 02:28 AM
Well done though babe, it's a big step.
Posted 21 August 2012 - 03:48 PM
Posted 21 August 2012 - 04:49 PM
Posted 21 August 2012 - 05:21 PM
Posted 21 August 2012 - 06:24 PM
Anyway, I'm glad you are being so brave.
Posted 22 August 2012 - 12:20 AM
Posted 22 August 2012 - 05:42 AM
In fact, let me know when you decide to wear short sleeves and I will do it with you. My psych is working on getting me to stop wearing long sleeves right now....it's been really hot this summer...maybe it will be easier if we both know that someone else is doing the same thing at the same time.
Posted 22 August 2012 - 03:24 PM
Jaded Sky, that's a great idea, it just might be a little while before I'm healed enough to do it, so I don't want to make you wait, especially if I fail again. But having support definitely would make it easier for both of us, I think
Posted 22 August 2012 - 03:45 PM
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Posted 22 August 2012 - 03:56 PM
take baby step. walking around the block, then maybe a favorite store progressing up to things like the mall. don't set yourself up to be uncomfortable because that can be a trigger too.
i wish you all the luck in the world. i also recently decided i wanted to quit for good and i also know if i wanted to i could go back, the thing that keeps me strong is my love for my husband, i think about how it has hurt him everytime i've done that and it's unfair for him to have to see them and have it affect our relationship.
Posted 22 August 2012 - 05:43 PM
It's all about doing what's comfortable to you. If you're even a tiny bit unsure about showing your scars, don't. You want to be completely comfortable with it. I also think it's a good idea to have some come backs in mind if people ask. They can be funny, too. I think if they're really funny or random, it can kinda help to change the topic and lighten up the mood a little bit.
I have decided to wear skirts and short sleeves now and I'm totally comfortable with it. Given, I don't know how severe or noticeable your scars are, but that can definitely influence how comfortable you feel with showing them. I'm not exaggerating at all here - it's not as bad as you think. I haven't had one person ask me about them. You can see them on my arms and legs. No one has. And even if someone does, who cares? It's none of their damn business!!
Stay strong, hun, and I hope everything works out for you
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